


an Urging Need

by QuasiSolar



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Developing Relationship, Dry Humping, Golden shower, Hand Jobs, M/M, Omorashi, Piss kink, Urination, Watersports, Wetting, homoerotic tension, semi-public, two bros pissing on each other cuz they probably gay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 16:07:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22440019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QuasiSolar/pseuds/QuasiSolar
Summary: “Do you want to talk about it?”“About what? The fact that you made me piss myself? Or that I want you to piss on me back?”🚽🍌💦
Relationships: Choi San/Jung Wooyoung
Comments: 55
Kudos: 274





	1. Chapter 1

The practice was a long and exhausting one. They’re preparing for a comeback and can’t afford to slack off. San was giving his absolute best, as he always does, and once they’re done he grabs his water bottle and plops down to the floor. He downs half of it and hands the rest to Wooyoung, whose motionless form is now laying beside him.

“C’mon, you gotta drink some.” He murmurs and nudges Wooyoung on the side. The boy grunts but reluctantly lifts himself up to take a few gulps. “Drink more, it’s been a long one.” San says, shifting so that he can cuddle Wooyoung’s middle. He rests his head on the boy’s stomach, but it quickly rolls back to the floor after the boy pushed him off.

“Don’t crush me, I have to pee.” Wooyoung says and stands up to join Hongjoong and the rest of the boys in the front of the practice room, with San following right behind him and wrapping his arms around his middle. The boy doesn't protest and they stand like that for a while, listening to Yunho’s feedback, until at some point San squeezes Wooyoung’s stomach a bit harder and the boy swats his hands away, annoyed. San lets go, but leaves his head on the boy’s shoulder, lost in thoughts.

Once they’re back in the dorm they decide to go take a shower and get some rest in their rooms. Yunho is having a V live with Mingi later that night, so San takes the opportunity and drags Wooyoung behind him in the opposite direction.

“Come, we won’t disturb them. Let’s go to my room.” Wooyoung goes along and the moment they enter the room San is back to clinging to him. He grabs him from behind and drags him to bed, while Wooyoung tries to wriggle away.

“Let go of me, San. I’m going to take a shower.”

“Let’s just rest for a bit, I’m so tired.” They plop to the bed and San instantly wraps all of his limbs around the other boy.

“Don’t wanna. You’re smelly.” Wooyoung grunts, struggling to get away. “Come on. Stop groping me.” San ignores him and stills in his koala-embrace, his breath evening out, breathing in the Wooyoung smell and ready to take a nap. Wooyoung sighs. “All right. At least let me go take a leak. I’ll be right back.” He waits, but gets no response. “Let go.” San doesn’t, and the hand resting casually on his stomach starts exploring more intentionally now. When it gets under Wooyoung’s T-shirt, it stops and squeezes down. The boy gasps and jerks away. “What the hell, San! It’s not funny. Let me go, I gotta pee.” No answer. “I’m serious. Or do you want me to go on your bed?” There’s a pause, San doesn’t move, with his face still buried in the boy’s side.

“We could clean it up later.” Comes a murmur from under Wooyoung’s armpit. The boy props himself uncomfortably on one elbow.

“What?” He looks down and tries to untangle the entwining him limbs. San loosens the grip, but just enough for Wooyoung to sit comfortably. “What do you mean?” He tries to meet San’s eyes. “Stop being funny. Let me go.” San finally looks up into Wooyoung’s eyes, with a look Wooyoung can’t quite read, but not one of joking around. “Are you being serious right now?” Wooyoung asks carefully. San shrugs lightly and Wooyoung looks at him with wide eyes.

“I just thought it could be fun.” San says finally and slowly lets go of the other boy, but Wooyoung doesn’t move away, which San takes as a good sign and shifts so that he’s half-sitting with his back resting on the headband. He reaches a hand and guides Wooyoung to kneel above him, with his legs on both sides of San’s thighs. The boy is looking at him suspiciously but lets himself be maneuvered around without protest, staying in place once San is done and looking at him expectantly and with a hit of disbelief. “You could just…” San has to clear his throat to continue. “...just go like that.” He swallows and looks at the boy’s face, waiting for any reaction. He notices that the boy is starting to breath deeper, a bit unevenly and instinctively reaches a hand to rub reassurance into Wooyoung’s hips. This seems to stress the boy even further and he looks around, as if assessing his position.

“Are you being serious?” He repeats, trying to keep the disbelief in his voice and not let the anxiousness sip in.

"Only if you want to." Wooyoung shifts on his knees, swallows and looks away.

“I… I don’t know if I can.” He steals a quick glance at San but goes back to looking to the side. San doesn’t answer but his one hand moves to Wooyoung’s abdomen and gently presses down. Wooyoung hisses and does a move as if to swat San’s hand away, but he doesn’t, instead leaning ahead and propping his hands on the headband around San’s head and closes his eyes. San watches him let out a uneven breath. “Are you sure?” he asks with a shaky voice.

“Yeah.” San answers as calmly as he can, feeling his own heart race while still delicately massaging Wooyoung’s belly. “Just go. It’s okay.”

“It’s not that…” a gasp escapes Wooyoung’s lips mid sentence and San feels him tense. “San?” There’s a hint of rising panic in the voice and San sees a small stain forming in the front of Wooyoung’s sweatpants, but he doesn’t let it get to him and he keeps his voice low and calming.

“It’s okay. You’re okay.” San feels Wooyoung start to back away, but he keeps the embrace around his middle firm. “I’ve got you.” He pushes the boy gently down until the stain touches his crotch. Wooyoung’s defence seems to let go at the contact and he lets a steady stream soak through his pants and onto San’s with a sob. His body goes lax, hands and head falling to San’s shoulders and all San can hear are quick, uneven breaths and quiet whimpers in his ear. And all he can feel is burning warmth spreading through his body, surrounding him and he has to put physical effort not to fall apart himself. His head falls back and he lets himself close his eyes. He absorbs the warmth, both from the liquid and the one radiating from Wooyoung’s body, the deep rises and falls of the boy’s chest against his own and the barely there warmth of Wooyoung’s breath on his neck. He feels that he’s hard in his pants and he’s pretty sure that Wooyoung can feel it, too.

After a while he opens his eyes as he feels Wooyoung shift and slowly rises himself on shaky arms. He tries to look him in the eyes but the boy is avoiding his gaze.

“I’ll take the shower first.” Wooyoung says and gets to his feet before San’s now slower brain catches up to the situation.

“Um… sure.” He manages to get out. “Uh, wait.” Wooyoung stops in the middle of the room but doesn’t look back. “Are you… Do you need any help?” He kicks himself internally for the stupid question.

“I’m okay.” Wooyoung answers, and San is not sure which question, hoping that both. There’s a klang and San finds himself staring at the closed doors. His head is full of thoughts but he intentionally pushes them to the back of his head and lets his autopilot take over, quickly taking off the soaked sheets and changing from now freezing cold sweatpants into a fresh pair, cringing as he has to put them on over still sticky legs.

He quickly whips around when he hears the door open and stands awkwardly, still holding the wet trousers. Wooyoung looks in his direction but quickly looks away, having spotted the curled up sheets on the floor, and goes to his shelf.

“Uh, Wooyoung…”

“You can take the shower now.”

“Oh… yeah, okay.”

San takes the quickest shower in his life and dries himself off, praying for Wooyoung not to have left the room. He didn’t even manage to figure out what he’s going to tell him once he gets out when he swings the door open and looks around.

Wooyoung is standing near his shelf and doesn’t look back when he hears San approach. The boy stops a few steps away and takes a deep breath.

“Wooyoung, I know you probably don’t want to talk about this but I just want to say I’m sorry. I don’t know what got into me. It was weird and I shouldn’t have…”

“It’s okay.” Wooyoung cuts him off quickly. He sighs and turns around to face San. “It was weird…” He says as he closes the distance between them. “but it was not terrible. Come on, Let’s go to Yeosang’s.” He pats San’s butt with a feisty smile and leaves the room and a speechless San in it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first fic in this fandom so hi guys


	2. Chapter 2

Surprisingly, things went back to normal between the two. At least on the surface. The night after everything went down San hardly slept a wink, worried sick that because of his stupidfuckingwhim things will become awkward between him and Wooyoung in the best-case scenario, and he’s going to lose the boy completely in the worst. The next morning, San went down to the dining area with a heavy heart and a lump in his throat, accompanying the bags under his eyes. He tried to prepare himself for the worst, carefully controlling his facial expressions. Yet as he approached the dining room, he could clearly hear Wooyoung’s squeaky laugh, unmistakably standing out from the mixture of other voices. He hesitated only for a second before taking one steadying breath and entered the room. His eyes quickly scanned the area and found the black head almost immediately. Wooyoung was sitting with his back to the door, chatting away with Yunho and Yeosang. San’s heart fluttered when he noticed that the boy had saved him a place next to himself, like he usually does. This could be not to draw unnecessary attention from other members though, he thought, as he willed his legs to move forward. But Wooyoung greeted San with a big smile when he saw him and updated him quickly on the heated argument about whether spiders are related to octopuses he was currently having with Yunho. San answered politely to any questions directed his way, not to come across as rude, but was at the same time hyper aware of the boy next to him, carefully observing him from the corner of his eye. At first glance he seemed like his usual, loud and bubbly self, but for someone who has spent as much time observing and learning his way of being and little quirks as San did, the difference was unmistakable. His movements were just a bit overwrought, his smile never leaving his face, as if careful not to show what lies underneath, and whenever their eyes would meet, the boy quickly looked away.

San observed quietly, took it all in and came to the conclusion that he has to try and talk to Wooyung again. He caught him before the next practice and dragged him by the sleeve to the side.

“Wooyoung, wait…” The boy stopped reluctantly, looking longingly after the other members, who disappeared into the practice room. San waited for him to turn around, but when he didn’t, he continued anyway. “Are you okay? Can we talk later today? I… I can keep away from you if you want. Just... tell me what you need.” The boy sighed after a pause and looked him properly in the eyes for the first time.

“Look, San. I already told you. Yesterday was… Everything is okay. Don’t be dramatic. I don’t want things to be awkward between us. And you definitely don’t have to keep away. That would just make the things weirder. And others would start asking questions. Let’s just... Not talk about this for the time being, okay?” He kept San gaze steadily and waited for him to nod reluctantly. San didn’t seem convinced, but it had to do for now. “Come on, they’ll be waiting for us.”

So San dropped it. If that was what Wooyoung wanted, he decided to do his best to be there for him in any way he needed him. He was careful with the skinship at first, willing to give the boy space, in case he was no longer as comfortable with San touching him as he used to be. He tried to keep his distance, but Wooyoung made it clear that he’s not having any of it, grabbing, hugging and touching San even more than usual, as if to make a point. Still, the first time San touched him on his own accord, he was paying close attention to the boy’s reaction. They were at a fanmeeting, San made sure for Wooyoung to see him approaching, and slowly wrapped his arm around the boy’s middle. He felt him freeze for a split second and exhale the air he had in his lungs, but he regained his composure quickly, put his hand over San’s and went on babbling through the mic. San felt him relax in his embrace, absorbed in interaction with the fans as he started walking around with San plastered to his back.

Wooyoung still avoided long eye contact, and whenever their eyes would meet on accident he would quickly look away, startled, but always made sure to look right back and smile brightly. San always smiled back. The boy made no attempts to talk with San about the events from  _ that  _ afternoon and San didn’t pressure him, though he did feel the topic hanging above them. They also didn't spend time just the two of them, Wooyoung made sure of that. San was quick to pick the unease in Wooyoung’s behaviour whenever it seemed like they were about to, and made sure to prevent that from happening, consciously ignoring the sting in his own heart. 

But things  _ were  _ coming back to normal. Wooyoung made it clear that he still expected special attention, so that’s what San was giving him, he just had to be a bit more careful than usual. 

***

A couple of weeks later, San notices during one practice that Wooyoung is quieter than usual. No bitchy comments, no random outbursts of laughter or enthusiastic shouts. He’s less focused, his moves sloppy and unfinished. San pretends not to notice the glances he steals at San whenever he thinks he’s not looking. He tries to reason with himself that maybe the boy just has a worse day, when a water bottle is pushed right in his face. San freezes for a second, his mind taking him back in time to the day when…, but he quickly regains his composure and looks past the bottle to the arm holding it, and further, to Wooyoung’s face, looking at him expectantly. The boy shakes the bottle impatiently, his expression purposely unreadable. San takes it and drinks some, trying to convince himself about the innocence of the gesture. Wooyoung made it clear that he does not intend on bringing up the events of that day any time soon, and San should do a better job at respecting that and act normally, he thinks, so he puts the bottle away and goes back to practice.

Once the practice is over, they all gather on the floor to talk. San sits in the back and is soon joined by Wooyoung, who unceremoniously settles down between San’s parted legs and wriggles back, to lean back on him comfortably. San inhales deeply to ground himself, then slowly reaches his hands around Wooyoung’s middle and rests his head on the boy’s shoulder. He lets himself close his eyes despite the tension. Wooyoung’s presence always has a calming effect on him, he can never get tired of the comfort it gives him. He snuggles the boy closer and lets Hongjoong’s talk become a background noise.

An elbow to his ribs makes him snap his eyes open, right to a water bottle being handled to him. San regards it calmly this time, then the back of the boy in front of him. Wooyoung didn’t turn around to look at him, but San can sense the tension and anticipation radiating from him anyway. He takes the water and downs it with big, steady gulps, his eyes fixed on the back of the boy’s head. He looks at the small ear, almost sees it perk up, listening. He feels the boy’s breathing has sped up just a bit.

Once he’s done, he handles the bottle back. Wooyoung takes it without a word and turns back ahead, snuggling into San just a friction more, as San lets himself get lost in his rushing thoughts.

They don’t talk during the car ride, but Wooyoung spends it plastered to San’s side. When they enter the dorm, Wooyoung takes San’s hand and leads him without a word into San’s room. San doesn’t break the silence, either, and obediently follows behind. They enter the room, Wooyoung locks the door behind them and hesitantly turns around, to find San standing in the middle of the room, regarding him carefully.

“Wooyoung?” He asks tamely.

“Yeah?” The boy circles San, not meeting his eyes, and sits on San’s bed. The one San saw him in his most wornurable state, he thinks but quickly pushes the thought away.

“What are we doing?”

“You're going to return the favor.” He finally looks San in the eyes.

“You mean…?”

“Do you need to drink more?”

“Um… I … I don't know.”

The room goes silent for a while, until San speaks up.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“About what? The fact that you made me piss myself? Or that I want you to piss on me back?” San cringes at the directness and almost accusatory tone of the question.

“Both, I guess.”

“Not especially.”

“Are you… okay with this?”

“Well, apparently. I wouldn’t be asking you if I weren’t, would I?”

“...I don’t know.” San answers truthfully. He really doesn’t. And it doesn’t sit well with him.

“I wouldn’t, so don’t overthink it. Just… just come here, okay?” San approaches reluctantly. “Are you… I mean, can you do it now?”

“...yeah.” San answers after a while. “How do you want to do this?”

“On the floor, so that we won’t have to change the sheets.” Comes an immediate answer.

“Mingi?” 

“He’s not going to disturb us. I told him to bounce.” San snickers at that despite himself.

“Okay, so…” San observes Wooyoung’s features as the boy looks to the side.

“Let’s just do it.” He says finally, but doesn’t make a move, and San doesn’t either, observing. Wooyoung huffs out an annoyed breath and furrows his brows. San sees his hands start to shake right before he clenches them and starts sliding to his knees, still not meeting San’s eyes. Yet San still doesn’t move, which seems to unnerve the boy even further. “What are you waiting for?” He snaps. “I thought I told you to…” His voice breaks, he’s breathing quickly, unable to finish the sentence. He squeezes his eyes and shakes his head. “Just…” This time it’s San who doesn’t let him finish. He slides to his knees and wraps his arms around Wooyoung. He holds him, listening to the sniffles and uneven breaths and his heart  _ aches _ . “I’m sorry…” Comes a weak voice.

“No. Don’t apologise. We don’t have to. You don’t have to. It’s okay, Woo.” San tries to soothe his friend, gently patting his head, and not to fall apart himself. 

“I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m reacting like that. I… I thought about it and I thought that I wanted to...”

“It’s okay. It’s okay.” San is lost for words. “You don’t have to.”

“But I wanted to.”

“Maybe… another time then.”

“But I  _ wanted to _ .” The boy insists, sounding almost like a child whose toy has been stolen. “Can we… Can we just cuddle first? Like we usually do?”

“...sure. Of course. Whatever you want.”

San helps Wooyoung up and on the bed. He arranges them so that they’re facing each other, with Wooyoung’s head under San’s chin, and wraps his hands around him protectively. He listens to both of their breaths slowly even out.

After a while, San starts wondering if the boy has fallen asleep, when a weak voice provides him with an answer.

“San?”

“Yeah?”

“Is it weird that I liked it? When you… What you made me do?” San thinks.

“I don’t think so. I think it’s normal. And it doesn’t matter, anyway. It just means that you trust me.”

“I do. And I still want you to do it. I don’t know why. I just… want to.” And after a break. “Do you?” He leans back, trying to meet San’s eyes. San breaths out and lets him.

“Yeah.” he says stadily. Wooyoung smiles gently.

“Good. Then I'm ready."

San nods slowly and untangles himself from the other boy. He gets off the bed and stands in front of it, waiting for Wooyoung's next move. The boy stays in his place for a while, looking at San intensely. He then gets up in a determined, smooth motion and slides gracefully to his knees in front of the bed. San sees he’s already breathing heavily again.

“Look at me.” San asks, his voice gentle, and Wooyoung lifts his gaze hesitantly. San searches his face carefully, then nods. Wooyoung smiles lightly and nods back. “Promise me that if you feel like backing away at any point you will let me know, okay?” Wooyoung nods again.

“Okay.” San answers. He doesn’t move, suddenly feeling lost. “Um...” He fidgets in his place. Then moves to undo his zipper, but stops. “Actually, could you look away?” Wooyoung does, his eyes jump on random objects before he breathes out and closes them. There’s a rustle of clothes and another pause. “Just... give me a second.” There’s tension in San’s voice. “I don’t... um...”

“’s okay. There’s no rush.” Wooyoung is surprised at the calmness of his own voice.

“Okay, okay. I think I’m going to...” San swallows. “Can I?” Wooyoung just nods, suddenly unable to speak.

The heat near his ribs still catches him by surprise. He snaps his eyes open and looks down at his rising chest and the quickly growing wet spot. He looks up at San’s face, and is surprised to be met with reddened cheeks and hooded eyes. Their eyes meet for a second before San looks down and guides the stream lower, to Wooyoung’s crotch. The feeling is weird, for lack of a better word. Not exactly unpleasant, but… intense. Not completely foreign, either. Relief, mixed with shame, confusion and all wrapped in comforting warmth, all wash over him at the same time, making his mind go fuzzy. They bring him back to a vague, distant past, to a simpler state of mind. It also evokes a more recent memory, along with all the conflicting emotions he tried so hard to suppress until now. The boy looks to the side. He’s vaguely aware of his parted lips and heavy breathing, as if he had just ran a marathon. He feels the blush covering his whole face. He's deliberately not looking down, not to make the awareness of his growing hard-on more real than it needs to be. His hands suddenly itch, to do  _ something _ , to cover or touch himself, he doesn’t know.

Then the warm stream goes back up and up and Wooyoung startles when it reaches his collarbones. The boy steals a nervous glance at San’s face, but San stops there and the stream slowly grows thinner and finally comes to an end.

The silence that fills the room is suddenly unbearable. Wooyoung starts being hyper aware of the wetness and the puddle gathering under his knees. He looks down at his hands, but they soon go blurry. He wraps his hands around himself and tries to blink the tears away but it's too late and they're falling on his cheeks, suddenly so many of them and impossible to stop.

All of a sudden, San is there, too, taking Wooyoung’s shaking form in his arms. The boy tries to push him away on instinct but San just squeezes harder, as if taking the wetness and quickly growing coldness on himself.

“You did so, so good, Woo.” He whispers near his ear. “Come on, let’s get you out of those clothes and into the shower.” Wooyoung lets himself be helped up, sees the wet spots on San’s knees and quickly looks away. He doesn’t protest when San leads him into the bathroom and helps him out of the wet clothes. He keeps his eyes casted downwards, his arms hanging loosely on his sides. “Wooyoung?” Sans voice sounds concerned. “Are you okay? Do you want me to...” Wooyoung shakes his head no, rubbing his arms. “Can you look at me, please?” Wooyoung does, his eyes still wet from the tears, and San searches his face carefully. The boy tries to smile as best as possible.

“I’m okay, San. Give me a second, I’ll be right out.” San hesitates, then nods.

“Okay. Take your time. I’ll wait outside.” He squeezes the boys biceps reassuringly and leaves. Once he’s alone, Wooyoung dares a glance in the mirror. He takes in the reddened cheeks and puffy eyes. He also doesn’t miss the sparkly of satisfaction in them. He didn’t lie, he realises not without surprise, he really is okay. He shakes his head and turns on the shower. As he washes himself quickly, he tries not to let the regret of washing San off of himself get to him.

When Wooyoung leaves the bathroom, San is in clean clothes and there's a cloth on the floor. He feels San’s eyes on him, watching him. He approaches slowly and meets them.

“Thanks?” He smiles shyly. San lets out the breath he’s been holding and shakes his head, smile spreading on his own face.

“Sure. Anytime.” Wooyoung rolls his eyes and breaks into a wide smile, grabs San’s hand and pushes him to the bathroom. 


	3. Chapter 3

“Woo, you coming?” Yeosang asks as he gathers his stuff after a practice.

“Yeah, yeah. Just a sec.”

“Actually, Wooyoung?” San interupts instantly. “I thought we could stay behind and stretch.” He tries to look indifferent, but fails miserably with the gaze of his friend now drilling into him suspiciously. “Do you mind going ahead, Yeosangie?” Yeosang raises an eyebrow and looks questionably at Wooyoung, who searches San’s face for a while.

“Uh, sure, yeah.” He decides finally. “Go ahead first, Yeosang, I’ll see you at the dorm.”

Yeosang doesn’t say anything, just sends San one of his unreadable, piercing stares, then nods once and leaves without a word. San swallows, always feeling uneasy when the boy looks at him like that, as if looking right through him or peeping into his soul, effortlessly discovering all his little secrets.

“I'm gonna have to hang out with him later.” Wooyoung murmurs more to himself, putting his bag back down. “We haven’t done anything together for a while.” He settles on the floor in front of the mirror and starts stretching. San only hums in response, busy with roaming through his bag, but Wooyoung pays him no mind and only looks back at the sound of the door being locked. He watches San with an raised eyebrow as he just stands there, fumbling something in his hands. Wooyoung is about to call out to him, when he seemingly comes to some kind of conclusion, turns around and approaches him slowly, as if with caution. Wooyoung is still watching him suspiciously when he extends his arm and hands him a water bottle. The boy furrows his brows in confusion. Then, when the realisation hits him, he stares at San with disbelief. The boy just shrugs and tilts his head slightly, watching for Wooyoung’s reaction.

“What are you… You know that Yeosang is in the room, right?”

“I know.” San says simply and opens the cap. He then sits cross legged on the floor and hands Wooyoung the bottle. The boy takes it, but sets it in front of himself, eyes still fixed on San’s face.

“Then how…?”

“We could do it here.” Wooyoung's eyes go wide and he leans back in shock.

“That is… such a bad idea, San.” He says slowly, as if talking to a child. “Somebody could see…”

“The door is closed. Besides, no one uses this room at this hour except for us.“ Wooyoung just keeps staring at him, obviously not convinced. “It's up to you. We can just stretch if you don’t want to do it. But last time… you enjoyed it?” San says carefully. “Right? So if you want to try… I will take care of everything, you don’t have to worry about anything.”

“I don’t know, San.” Wooyoung looks around, as if the empty practice room could provide him with much needed arguments. He doesn’t want to admit that the thought is making him feel... some sort of way. “What if… How will I get to the room?”

“You can wrap my hoodie around your waist. And if we meet someone you’ll just hide behind me.” Wooyoung sends him his best bitch face. Like that’s going to work. “Look, I don't want to pressure you. But if you want to, I swear I’ll take care of everything.” Wooyoung exhales slowly and the room falls silent. Then he looks at San with amusement and shakes his head.

“This is ridiculous. If somebody sees me with pissed pants I quit the band and move to Iceland.” He warns. “And you’re not coming with me.”

“Won't let that happen.” San smiles. Wooyoung glances at him one last time, then at the bottle in front of him.

“Okay. It’s on you if something goes south.” He says, takes the bottle and drinks some. Then looks questionably at the other boy.

“It’s just some nettle.” San says apologetically. “I’ve read it can… you know, help with… this.”

"You came prepared, huh?”

“Yeah.” San admits without arguing, and watches mesmerised as Wooyoung drinks half of the bottle in one go. “How much do you have to go?”

“I don’t know… not much? Haven’t drank much since morning.” San nods.

“That's okay, we have time. Drink some more and let’s stretch.”

The boys stretch, San mostly silent, admiring Wooyoung babbling and whining about random stuff and obediently drinking the water whenever San slides it to him. When he downs the last drops, San stands up and goes to his bag again. When he comes back, he settles behind Wooyoung's back, legs on each side of the boy’s body, and handles him another full bottle, already open. Wooyoung is breathing somewhat unevenly and eyes the bottle, then San in the mirror.

“Give me a second.” He says with an effort “I... already drank a lot.” San just hums and guides the bottle up, to the boy’s mouth.

“That's the point.” he murmurs in his ear and presses the edge to Wooyoung’s lips. The boy swallows, but tilts his head back and lets himself be given the water. He obediently drinks it in small gulps, waiting for San to take the bottle away. When he doesn't, he moves a hand to do it himself, but San grabs his hand and holds it to Wooyoung’s side. The boy lets out a small whimper, but shuts his eyes and keeps drinking, some drops missing his mouth and sliding down his chin. Eventually San takes the bottle away and gently wipes his chin. He squeezes Wooyoung’s shoulder and tries to meet his gaze in the mirror, but the boy is looking down, focused on breathing evenly.

“Are you okay?” San asks cautiously.

“Yeah… “

“I didn’t... overdo it, did I? You can… I know I don't have to say this, but we can stop whenever…”

“I know, San.” Wooyoung cuts him off. “I’m okay. It’s just a lot of water, I guess.” he adds and San smiles.

“I know. Just punch me if I do something wrong, though.” He puts a hand on the boy's back. “Come on, I'll help you stretch.”

Wooyoung exhales and bends down apprehensively, while San lightly pushes at the bottom of his back. He tries to compromise stretching and breathing with a full bladder, he really does, but quickly gives up and gets back up with a groan.

“How is it?” Wooyoung lifts his gaze to meet San’s eyes in the mirror and the boy is taken aback for a second by the desperation and rawness in them.

“It’s… I don't have to go yet, but... it hurts a little. I’m not used to drinking this much, I think.” San hums and pushes at the boy’s shoulder to lean back on him.

“Can you drink more?” He asks quietly. Wooyoung exhales and nods, so San guides the bottle to his mouth but the boy stops him.

“Wait. Just… will you stop when I, you know, give you a sign? Because... it's starting to hurt a little and… you’ll stop, right?” San tries to hold himself together at the sight of Wooyoung’s pleading eyes.

“Of course.” He manages to respond. “Drink only as much as you can take.” Wooyoung smiles lightly, as if relieved, as if San is actually doing him a favor. “I would… appreciate it if you drank the whole thing, though.” San watches cautiously for the boy’s reaction.

Wooyoung looks apprehensively at the bottle in front of him, then meets San’s eyes again, drilling holes in him. “Yeah, okay. Just… slowly.”

San tilts the bottle so that only a small stream reaches Wooyoung’s lips, pulling the boy back with the other hand, so that his whole weight is leaning on him, and watches in the mirror for any signs of distress on the boy’s face. Wooyoung’s eyes are closed, and he’s trying to breathe evenly through his nose while taking steady gulps. After a while his eyes open, but he doesn't move, instead searching for San's eyes. San takes the bottle immediately.

“A break…” Wooyoung huffs, and a grimace of pain overtakes his face. He lets out a faint whimper and San feels his whole body tense up in his grip.

“What is it?”

“A cramp.” The boy pants out, not opening his eyes.

San’s hand finds Woooung’s belly, sliding under his T-Shirt and he starts massaging delicately. He can't help but notice the way the boy’s belly is bulged and tense. Wooyoung is breathing deeply and unevenly, and tilts his head back, resting it on San’s shoulder with a huff.

“That bad?”

“No…” He tries to gather his thoughts. “Just… give me a second.”

San keeps massaging his belly, letting himself admire Wooyoung’s features in the reflection in the meantime. He takes in the light blush spreading on his cheeks, his slightly parted lips, and little wrinkles of distress on the boy’s forehead. He watches his chest rise and fall and listens to the heavy breathes and quiet whimpers the boy lets out. Then he pushes lightly on Wooyoung’s belly. The boy’s eyes shoot open immediately, his lips twitching in a grimace and he tries to push his legs together.

“Shh. It’s okay.” San’s hand grabs the boy’s thigh and he gently but persistently pushes it to the side. Wooyoung lets him, parting his legs back, panting deeply. “Relax and just keep breathing. Do you want to…”

“No. Not yet. I want to drink the rest. Okay?” He looks up over his shoulder, directly into San’s eyes and San can’t help but smile brightly.

“Of course.” There's not much left in the bottle and San has to admit that he didn't expect the boy to drink this much. He shifts and gently pushes Wooyoung’s legs back apart, the boy having closed them in the process. “Keep them like that.”

Wooyoung exhales one last time and closes his eyes, with a determined look on his face. San smiles to himself and guides the bottle to the boy’s lips yet again. “Don't rush it.” He whispers and watches Wooyoung’s throat work with every gulp. When the last drops slide into Wooyoung’s open mouth San feels the boy grab his thigh.

“Open your eyes.” He whispers in Wooyoung’s ear. The boy does so reluctantly and meets San’s hungry gaze with his desperate one. “How is it?”

“Hurts…” Wooyoung whimpers and San feels him start to tremble slightly.

“I know. Here, give me your hand.” he guides Wooyoung’s hand to his stomach. The boy looks to the side, embarrassed, but doesn't take the hand away. “Feel how round you are?” He purrs into Wooyoung’s ear. “Bet you feel so full, too.” The boy doesn't answer, eyes fixated stubbornly on the floor. “Look at yourself.” San demands. Wooyoung lifts his gaze apprehensively and the sight he sees doesn’t amuse him in the slightest. He’s sprawled shamelessly in San’s lap, red-face and looking fucking bloated, his tight joggers leaving little to the imagination. He looks away, unimpressed, but San presses their intertwined hands down threateningly. “Look again.” He keeps the pressure on Wooyoung’s strained bladder and massages lazily. Wooyoung’s head goes fuzzy and he parts his lips involuntarily, panting hard. He tenses up despite himself and glances at his reflection again, following San’s instruction. He quickly looks away, though, embarrassed. “Remember yourself like that.” San purrs and presses both of their hands down, hard. Wooyoung’s eyes go big and he yanks his hand free.

“San...” he moans. “San, I can't. Can I…”

“Shh, not yet. Hold just a little bit longer, okay?” San keeps massaging and squeezing down while Wooyoung wriggles, squirms and trembles, struggling to breath and not squeeze his legs together. San watches his toes curl from the struggle, feels his muscles flex under his hands. “You're doing so good, Woo.” He praises, as he interlinks their fingers on the floor and squeezes Wooyoung’s hand encouragingly. Then San’s other hand slides lower, briefly grazing over Wooyoung’s dick, testing. Wooyoung’s mind seems to clears for a second and he stares at San intently, as if trying to read him. San holds his gaze and his hand goes back up, squeezing Wooyoung's bladder. He feels Wooyoung’s whole body tense up unimaginably, but the boy refuses to break eye contact, breathing deeply and squeezing San’s thigh, undoubtedly leaving bruises. San keeps the pressure and drinks up the desperation and panic seeping into Wooyoung's gaze, the boy struggling for breath and not to squeeze his eyes shut.

“How is it?”

“Can’t hold it, San. I think-”

“Ask.” Wooyoung’s eyes go wide with shock, then something darker. He pants deeply, each breath looking almost painful. They don’t say anything for an agonising moment, just staring each other down, assessing how far the other one is ready to go.

Wooyoung is the first one to look away. He hangs his head low with a huff and half-closes his eyes. San feels some of the tension leave his body, but his breathing is still hitched. San wants to hug him and shower him with praises and reassurances and tell him how good he’s doing and how beautiful he is, but he stays silent, waiting intently for Wooyoung’s next move.

“Please…” the boy whispers finally.

“I don’t think that’s how you ask for something, Woo. Why don’t you try again, hm?” Wooyoung wines and San _just imagined_ him bucking his hips up slightly, his thighs falling to the sides.

“Please, San. Can I pleease release myself.” His voice breaks at the end and San has to take a deep breath to ground himself.

“Okay, Woo. You can go.” Wooyoung breathes out with relief. “Look at me first, though.” Wooyoung looks up apprehensively and San’s heart skips a beat. The boy’s eyes are hooded, as if keeping them open caused the boy physical difficulty, lips slightly parted, causing him to look as if he had run a marathon high. He keeps squeezing and releasing San’s hand like one would a stress ball. San sees him struggle to keep his head up obediently and admires his flair and raw openness, willingness to trust San and stay at his mercy. To give himself away. “That’s good, Woo. Keep looking at me.” He hopes Wooyoung doesn’t hear the nervousness in his own voice, but he figures the boy is too out of it to notice anything.

“San…”

“It’s okay, Woo. I’m here. You can let go now.” He squeezes Wooyoung’s hand, his other hand still on the boy’s bladder, barely adding any pressure now.

“It’s okay?” Wooyoung repeats like a child, eyes sparkling with hope and desperation.

“Yes, Woo. It’s okay.”

San sees it in Wooyoung’s face when it happens. The glitch of panic and then the obvious relief, almost bliss overtaking his features. He soon breaks eye contact as his eyes shut down despite his best efforts. San can’t blame him for it and instead he sets on watching a dark patch spread on Wooyoung’s pants. The boy keeps a strong grip on San’s thigh as he empties his bladder. The feeling of it seeping through and wetting his sweats is so foreign, unpleasant and just _wrong_. As if his body knew it’s not supposed to happen. And yet it is, and what’s more, some ~~sick~~ part of Wooyoung is enjoying it.

The stream thins out and then stops. Wooyoung’s head rolls back and his whole body goes limp, as if someone cut out the power. He’s breathing deeply and feels his chest start to burn and the familiar pressure behind his eyes. He squeezes them as hard as he can, but the feeling doesn’t go away. And San obviously sees right through him.

“Wooyoung?” San tries tamely, stroking the boy’s hand, but doesn't get an answer. “Are you going to cry?” He tries to make his voice as soft as possible.

“I don’t know...“ Wooyoung whispers, but his breaking voice answers for him. “I- I think so.” he looks hopelessly at San’s reflection, as if asking for a green light, with tears already in his eyes.

“That's okay, Woo.” San finally lets himself squeeze the tender body lying in his arms, so vulnerable and open and _his_. No. He shakes the thought away and straightens up. He’s here for Wooyoung, he reminds himself. “You can cry, Woo. I’m here.”

And so Wooyoung lets the tears fall free, finally bringing his legs up and wrapping his hands around himself. San follows and holds the boy’s whole form, rocking gently from side to side. “Shh, you’re okay. You did nothing wrong. You did so good.” The boy doesn’t cry long, though, the growing coldness and discomfort quickly bringing him back to earth. Then San shifts his weight closer and Wooyoung suddenly feels San’s unmistakable hard-on poking his back. This also helps him recoil and he quiets down quickly.

“Sorry-” hiccup “I do this every time.”

“Don’t be.” San stays a bit longer wrapped around Wooyoung’s back, inhaling his smell, but when he feels the boy shift and grunt expectantly, he slowly unwraps his limbs and stands up. Wooyoung wants to follow but San stops him with a hand. He quickly rushes to his bag and brings some things over, then he helps Wooyoung to his feet and drops a towel on the wet patch on the floor. He crouches down to quickly clean up the mess, while Wooyoung steps in place nervously, trying to look anywhere but down at himself or San.

“It's okay,“ San answers his unspoken concerns “they always wash the floors on the weekends.” He puts the wet towel in the plastic bag and offers Wooyoung his hoodie. "Just wrap it around your middle" Wooyoung does as he’s asked and looks at San skeptically. His whole front is showing a huge wet spot with unmistaken origins. “It’s really not that bad.”

“Right.” Wooyoung doesn’t have the strength to argue at this point. “Can we just go?” San doesn't have to be told twice. He takes both of their bags, grabs Wooyoung’s hand and leads him out of the room, slightly behind himself.

Luckily the corridors are already empty at this hour and they make their way to the elevator without meeting anyone. Wooyoung tries hard not to cringe with every step from the sticky wetness between his thighs, now also unbearably cold. He keeps his eyes stubbornly ahead and focuses his attention on squeezing San’s hand as hard as possible. The boy doesn’t seem to mind, though.

Once they enter the elevator San hesitates for a second, then awkwardly stands just across the other boy, hiding him from anybody that could enter the elevator in favor of making them look as if they’re making out. San tries to find the right words when he sees Wooyoung’s eyes wander down and land on his fading hard-on.

“Does it turn you on?” Wooyoung asks matter-of-factly and looks up, his eyes demanding and curious, drilling holes in Sans face mercilessly. San feels his face heat up. He takes a step back and shifts on his feet. He has to swallow the lump in his throat to answer.

"Uh… well, I mean, I don’t know. It's… you’re kinda… e-erotic? Sorry if it makes you uncomfortable…, it's just…"

"It’s fine." Wooyoung cuts him off. "So did it like… become our thing?" San searches the boy’s face cautiously.

"Well… Yeah? I think so. I mean as long as-"

"So how am I supposed get to the bathroom with Yeosang in the room." Wooyoung doesn't let him finish yet again.

“Just… make a run for it?” San dares to grin and Wooyoung punches him on the shoulder.

“Shut up.”

“I’ll distract him.” San shrugs. The door to the elevator opens and San turns around and looks out for potential danger. When he confirms that the way is clear he waves to Wooyoung to follow. “Are you going to be okay… in the shower, and all...?” he asks when they reach the boy’s room.

Wooyoung just snarls. “I’m fine. You’d better focus on explaining this shit to Yeosang.” He looks San in the eyes. “I'll see you tomorrow?” The question itself is pointless, but San gets the intention nevertheless.

“Yeah.” He strokes the boy’s back and helps him adjust the hoodie. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” He repeats.

Wooyoung steals one last glance at San, then janks the door open and flees to the bathroom door. San can’t help but snicker as he enters the room.

“Is Wooyoung okay?” Right, Yeosang. When San faces him apprehensively, the boy is looking at him from his phone with suspicion.

“Uh, yeah. He just, um, spilled some water over himself.” Yeosang searches his face, then looks back at his phone.

“He’s fragile, you know?” He says casually, not looking up.

“Uh… Sorry?”

“I hope you're taking good care of him.” San’s brain takes a moment to process and comprehend the boy’s words, then another to form a reply.

“Um, yeah. Yes. I am.”

"Do you want me to leave?" San looks at him, confused again for a second.

"Oh. No, no. I’m going." He turns to the door but stops with a hand on a doorknob. "Just tell Wooyoung… that…"

"I’ll tell him I kicked you out. That's kinda true, too." San stares at the other boy for a second then smiles.

"Are we good?"

"Ask me tomorrow once I talk to him." San shakes his head but doesn’t argue.

“Goodnight then. To both of you. And don't talk too long, we have work tomorrow.”

“Goodnight, San.” Right. At least he’s leaving Wooyoung in good hands, San thinks as he makes his way to his room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> after drinking 1,5 bottle and an hour of holding it u rly have to pee, i checked
> 
> also idk how many more chapters i'll write cuz i like this concept a lot
> 
> now enjoy the comeback guys~


	4. Chapter 4

They're okay, San realises. They're doing this… thing together, and they're okay. They make it work, for now at least. This thing that started as an impulse, a tugging urge in San’s mind that he couldn’t quite put a finger on at the time, yet it wouldn’t go away until he acted upon it. And now… Now it has turned into reality. Though sometimes, when the doubts hit him, San is not sure if the whole ordeal wasn't just a feverish dream of a mad man. But then he remembers the warmth, the comfort, the trust, the feelings still clear in his mind as if it was today, as if engraved in his guts, now an integral part of him. And then there's the way Wooyoung looks at him sometimes, as if they were connected, as if they had a… _bond_ of some sort, that nobody else sees, but one that relentlessly pulls the two together, and San _knows_ it is real, maybe even more real than anything in his life. Even if he might not fully comprehend what that means, just yet.

They’re okay, yet San knows that he can’t let his guard down. He has to be careful. With everything, but first and foremost with Wooyoung. He, maybe more than anybody else, knows how fragile the boy can be despite his facade, how quickly his explosive personality can do a 180, thanks to the countless hours he’s spent learning and trying to understand his emotional ups and downs.

He also has to be careful with keeping things low profile, which can prove itself to be tricky with the life they’re living, especially with Yeosang’s careful, almost praying eyes, now watching him what seems like 24/7, as if waiting for him to slip. Though he seems to have gotten a silent green light for the time being. Otherwise he wouldn't be here now, shamelessly admiring Wooyoung as he casually makes his way down the stairs and joins the rest of the boys in the lobby with no rush, despite being the last one to join and almost 15 minutes late. The boy smiles brightly dodging the playful punches directed at him and dutifully takes Hongjoong’s scolding as his eyes quickly scan the room. Once they land on San his smile softens, setting on a warm and calm one, filled with fondness. He smoothly makes his way to the boy and plasters himself to his side, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. As if the position was his birthright. And to San it really is just that. It’s simply Wooyoung’s place. San smiles softly to himself as he wraps a hand around the boy and presses him closer. He feels the boy wriggle happily as he takes something from behind his back, handing it to San with a sneaky smile. It’s the hoodie from the previous evening, San realises.

“I didn't wash it.” he murmurs into San’s ear when he's sure nobody’s listening, looking at him challengingly and then away, leaving San speechless.

So yeah, they’re doing good. Better than San would have ever expected. Finding the time for just the two of them with their busy schedule is not an easy task, though. Between practicing, filming, fan meetings and events oftentimes the only free moments they have are evenings before bed, which they usually spent already in their seperate rooms.

That is, until one evening practice a couple of weeks later. That night Yunho has half of the members reluctantly stay behind and further polish the choreography, which leaves his and San’s room unoccupied, while the rest of the boys, including San and Wooyoung, gladly bolt upstairs. As San passes Wooyoung’s room he snickers at Yeosang, already face down on his bed, looking positively dead, though how the boy managed to beat them upstairs is beyond San. He’s also aware of the other occupant of said room silently following him behind, only his soft footsteps giving him away.

San doesn’t close the door behind himself as he enters the room and sure enough, a soft sound of them being locked follows soon after. His dreams of showering and washing the hours worth of sweat off of himself are temporarily forgotten as he slowly turns around. He’s met with the sight of Wooyoung with his back propped against the door, still breathing a bit heavily after the practise and watching him intently. San finds himself instantly drawn to the boy, as if some invisible force was pulling him closer until they’re inches apart. Wooyoung rests his head on the door, maintaining eye contact, and despite the slight height difference San suddenly feels small under the drilling, hungry gaze.  The position gives San a perfect view of his jawline and neck vines. San gulps, mesmerised and has to physically force himself to lift his eyes and meet Wooyoung’s hooded ones. The boy blinks at him slowly, with an unspoken challenge in his eyes.

“Wanna do it?” The question resonates in the tense silence of the room, it’s meaning almost surreal and it takes San an embarrassingly long time to respond.

“...Yeah. Do you?” Instead of answering, Wooyoung pushes himself from the door,  inching their faces dangerously close to each other, but then he brushes past San before the boy can so much as blink.

“I’ll bring the towels.” When San’s brain catches up and he finally turns around following the voice, Wooyoung is already gone in the bathroom. San bliks, looking at the empty door frame for a few seconds, then slowly makes his way to the bed and plops down. Relax, he thinks to himself. This is not about you. Don’t fuck it up. He hears Wooyoung re-enter the room and turns around to face him. He silently watches him approach, not daring to move a muscle until he’s standing right in front of him, towering over him yet again.

“Woo…” San’s voice comes out raspy, so he swallows and tries again. “How…?”

“Can you go?” San searches the boy’s face for a while without answering, and whatever he found there must have satisfied him, since the answer comes with much more strength and confidence.

“Yes.”

“Good.” Wooyoung says simply and drops the towel to the ground in front of the older boy. He hesitates a millisecond, then slowly lowers himself to his knees, helping himself with San’s knee for support. Once he’s down he looks up at San expectantly and notices him still watching him intently, which makes him crack a sly smile. “You okay? Did I do something wrong?”

“Nothing, it’s just… are you sure?” Wooyoung snarls at that.

“Will you stop with that? Last time you had me walking around in pissed pants, remember? Besides, I'm not a porcelain doll. You know that. I could knock you the fuck down any day, your takewondo wouldn’t even register what’s happening before you’d be flat on the ground.” This makes San relax a bit and he smiles back.

“I don't doubt that.”

“Yeah.” Wooyoung nods, mostly to himself. “Now then, let's see what you got.” He nudges San’s knees apart and wriggles between them. San sees him pause, as if considering something, but then he quickly removes his shirt over his head and tosses it to the side. He glances up at San for reaction, failing to hide the sudden uncertainty, and startles under the intensity of his gaze. His eyes wander to the side, after his shirt, and then down to his lap. “Is, um… Is this okay?” His hands suddenly itch to cover himself, but he wills them to stay at his sides. “I just thought… the shirt, um, would…”

“Yes.” San quickly cuts him off. “It’s okay. Of course. You’re, um…” He clears his throat and tries again. “Well, you’re okay. Do you want me to…?” He gestures in the vague direction of his middle and Wooyoung smiles slightly, relieved and encouraged by San’s own stuttering.

“Yeah, I think you’re gonna have to, if you want to, you know… do it, on me.”

“Right, yeah. So, um…” His hands halt at the waistband of the sweatpants and he looks deep into Wooyoung’s eyes. "You're just gonna… watch, huh?" Wooyoung’s smile widens with a mixture of fondness and a hint of slyness in his raised eyebrow.

"Yeah. If you don't mind." San huffs out a breathy laugh, then exhales, and slowly maneuvers himself to lower his sweatpants and underwear. As he does so, he lets the shirt fall to the front and cover his dick, now hanging loosely between his thighs without the support of the underwear, leaving just the tip free for Wooyoung’s eyes to wander. That’s more than enough for Wooyoung to stare at, though. He takes in the foreskin covered flesh, mesmerised and a bit intimidated, since it was his first such close encounter. Sure, he’s seen other members’ dicks, he’s also seen San’s dick, but never this close and personal, the experience both exciting and overwhelming. But the longer he looks at it, the more normal it becomes. Just another part of San. A nice part, just like the rest of the boy’s body. One he hasn’t explored yet, but is excited to. He slowly reaches his hand ahead, but he notices the boy tense at the movement, so he settles for resting it on San’s thigh.

“This is, um… Fuck.” Wooyoung sees San’s fists clenched at his sides, and the rawness and doubt in his eyes when he looks up makes his heart ache. He sends what he hopes is an encouraging smile and lightly squeezes his thigh. Finally, San seems to relax a bit and he hesitantly reaches out, caressing Wooyoung’s cheek with the top of his hand. “Where do you want it?” Now, it’s Wooyoung’s turn to look to the side as he bites on the inside of his cheek.

“Just, on my… “ He motions vaguely to his bare torso. “On my chest? And, umm… Yeah, I don't know.” San nudges his chin lightly, guiding his face back up.

“Want it on your face?” He sees Wooyoung's chest rise rapidly as his breath flutters. “Want me to piss on your face, Woo?”

“San…” Comes a bare audible whisper.

“Words, Wooyoung.” San says calmly and waits patiently for Wooyoung to swallow and  gather himself together.

“Yes.”

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, please?” San seems satisfied with the answer and his hand briefly slides to the boy's bare shoulder before breaking the contact completely. Instead, he lifts his shirt and takes his dick in hand, with Wooyoung's eyes automatically following the movement. The boy notices with a blush that the organ is a bit fuller than before and the foreskin has slightly retreated, making way for a smooth, pink head. San keeps his eyes on Wooyoung’s face as he props himself on one arm behind his back.

“Lift your face, Woo.” He orders with a low voice. Wooyoung exhales and obeys. He looks up at San, then he straightens up, rolling his shoulders experimentally and forcing his muscles to relax. San watches him get comfortable and ground himself with a silent admiration. Once he’s done, he looks up at San and gives him a slight nod. “Close your eyes.” San almost whispers and Wooyoung does, focusing on breathing deeply instead and savoring this new found peace of his mind. Just waiting, for everything San decides to give.

Yet the boy still flinches when the first drops hit his chest, barely managing to keep his eyes closed. The warm liquid quickly trickles down his abdomen, reaching his sweatpants and soon the warmth spreads around his crotch. His hands itch to  _touch_ , so he hesitantly lifts one up to his torso and experimentally massages the liquid into his stomach. His brows furrow and he opens his eyes to monitor San’s reaction as he slides his hand lower, and presses it down over his clothed dick, feeling it twitch with interest. San’s eyes follow Wooyoung’s every move, and he inhales sharply when he sees the younger boy start palming himself through the fabric. Then his eyes shoot up to Wooyoung’s face, and the boy halts in his movements and holds his breath involuntarily. He feels his heart beating painfully hard in his chest and hears the rush of blood in his ears as they stare into each other’s eyes and San guides the stream higher, over Wooyoung’s collar bones, his neck… Wooyoung closes his eyes when the stream reaches his cheek, some droplets bouncing off and landing on his now closed eyelids, and he tilts his head up. He’s breathing hard, as if he has just run a marathon. He squeezes his eyes tighter and a desperate moan escapes his lips as he desperately fondles his dick in his hands. As he inhales sharply some droplets get sucked into his mouth, leaving a salty taste. Not quite sure what he's doing, Wooyoung slowly parts his trembling lips further and sticks out his tongue ever so slightly. He hears San curse under his breath and the stream gets closer to his nose, trickling down and catching on his parted lips while Wooyoung eagerly gathers it with his tongue. Without thinking, he opens his mouth wider, inviting.

“Woo…” He hears San breathe out. Wooyoung opens his eyes again and looks up through his wet lashes, straight at the older boy, who's watching him back intently, breathing hard himself. They stare into each other's eyes as the stream slowly grows thinner and eventually stops.

There’s a pause, their mixed pants the only sound in the room. Wooyoung eyes the half hard dick in front of his face, pink and glistening, with some  remaining droplets. He sees the organ twitch under his gaze and his mouth suddenly feels tingly. He keeps his eyes fixated on the tip and before he can think what he's doing he's already moving ahead, entranced. 

Two firm hands grab each side of his face as he's held in place. “Wooyoung, what…” He looks up at San, slightly annoyed at being disrupted, but it quickly fades away when he sees the mixture of panic and surprise in San’s anyway fucked out expression. “Just… wait. We shouldn't… this…” He tries to make a coherent sentence between his pants but Wooyoung quickly cuts him off.

“I'm sorry." He backs away and settles back on his heels.

“No, don't… apologize.” San adds quickly. “Just...”

“No, I know. Sorry, I… I wasn’t thinking straight. Shouldn’t have done that.” He sits back and swallows. “Thanks for… this and, stopping me and, everything. You're great.'' San just stares at him, dumbfounded. Finally, Wooyoung lets out a shaky laugh and slumps a little. “That was… wow.” He lets his eyes wander down at the aftermath of the evening and he reaches up, sliding a hand over his wet torso. Then he sighs and leans ahead, back between San’s legs. San’s muscles tense, but Wooyoung just burrows his nose in the crook between his thigh and his stomach, breathing in deeply. And breathing out. He inhales the sharp smell of urine mixed with the sweet sweaty one, absorbs the heat radiating from the other body.

“Wooyoung, what are you, um, doing?”

“Just… let me do this.” Comes a muffled response.

“I’m… sweaty.”

“I know.” The boy answers shortly.

After a moment of silence Wooyoung feels a gentle, hesitant touch on his head. He all but purrs and wriggles closer, letting San know that the pats are very much appreciated. He smiles against the warm skin and lets his whole body weight fall ahead, just resting on the other boy. He wraps one hand around San’s leg and mindlessly draws patterns on his ankle. And he stays like that, not thinking about anything, just savoring the calmness that settled deep inside his body and lets the time pass freely. After a while he feels San shift, though.

“Woo?”

“Mm?”

“Are you okay?” Wooyoung grunts and reluctantly lifts his head, resting his chin on San thigh and faces the boy.

“Yeah. Are you? I didn’t… scare you, did I?”

"No, of course not.” San swallows. “It's just… I wasn't sure if… you… if you wouldn't regret it later. if you did… that.”

“Thank you, San.” His eyes involuntarily wander back to San's still bare dick, now back to its initial state.

“Umm…” Sans shifts uncomfortably and nibbles at the hem of his shirt, bringing it to the front to cover himself, but Wooyoung averts his eyes anyway and they land on the towel on the floor instead.

“We should clean up.” He sighs.

“Leave it. Just… take a warm shower, you must be getting cold.” 

“You sure?” San nods. “Yeah, shower sounds nice. Are you… also taking a shower?”

“In a second.” San smiles softly, helping the other up with one hand while quickly pulling up his sweats with the other. He doesn't let go of the boy’s hand as he leads him to the bathroom. They stop and San hesitates a bit, but before he can decide on his next action, Wooyoung moves their joined hands and slides them down his own torso, stopping at the waistband of his soaked sweats. San looks down, and sees the outline of Wooyoung’s cock, unmistakably swollen under the soaked material hugging it tightly. He feels Wooyoung’s eyes on him and he swallows, then looks up at the boy questioningly. The boy guides him to push the trousers down his hips and lets them fall to the ground.

“It's okay.” He says, not letting go of San’s hands. “You’re right. We don't have to rush. But I'm… here, I guess.”

“I know.” San says softly.

“Well,” Wooyoung clears his throat. “What about that shower, then? I'm getting kinda cold.” San startles and jumps to turn on the shower, setting the temperature. Wooyoung snickers to himself and steps in once San is done. “I won't be long.” He promises.

“Take your time.” San says and leaves the bathroom, just to come back soon after with the wet towel, collecting Wooyoung’s clothes from the floor on the way. “Hey, um… have you… told anybody about this? I mean, any of the guys?”

“What? No. Of course not. Why?”

“It’s just that… Yeosang...” Wooyoung humms in understanding.

“Yeah, well. Yeosang notices more than he lets on. He probably knows something is up, that's just how he is. Observant, I suppose. And overprotective at times. But he means good. And he knows you. He knows you're not, like, hurting me or anything. He knows you wouldn't. We’re just gonna have to let his overanalitic mind wonder, I guess.” Then Wooyoung yanks the shower curtain open and puts his hands on his hips, standing in his whole glory. San looks him up and down hungrily, the laundry forgotten in the sink. He opens his mouth as if to say something but decides against it and instead pushes fresh clothes into the boy's hands.

“Okay now, get out. My turn. And you can message Mingi that he can sleep at Yunho’s today. If you want.” Wooyoung grins and takes the clothes, but marches out the bathroom naked and dripping with water. He stops in the doorway, though, turning around.

“Hey, San?” San watches as his grin turns mischievous. “Next time you're getting wet.” And he’s gone, leaving San gawking open-mouth at an empty doorway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so it's here, sorry for the wait
> 
> also sorry abt the inconsistencies w the hausing n roommates situation, idk where how or with whom they live so i just write whatever, i hope it doesnt disturb the story too much
> 
> happy late 2nd anniversary to the boys n for me my one year mark w them, couldnt find a better way to waste my life away
> 
> alsoo theres a hint in this chapter for my future work (if it ever happens lol) wander if u can spot it xd
> 
> surprisingly i already have part of another chapter which i will upload soon aka hopefully before christmas so look forward to it (if u want)~


	5. Chapter 5

It’s their day of, first one in what feels like years. The eight boys spent the first part of the day hanging out in their shared area, taking the opportunity of being able to talk freely, without the cameras, their manager or their staff members attending them almost 24/7. Now Hongjoong has excused himself and retreated to his studio, with Seonghwa following close behind with a meek excuse of keeping him hydrated. Mingi and Yunho are busy playing some obscure video game for teens and Jongho stays close by pretending he’s not more invested in the screen than the other two. The remaining trio is watching a drama, Wooyoung squeezed with Yeosang on a small couch, and San sitting on the floor between the two. That is, at least two of them are watching, while Wooyoung keeps squirming, more focused on the side of San’s face than anything else while the cogs in his brain are almost visibly turning at full speed.

“You okay, Woo? You seem kind of restless. Need to take a leak or something?” Yeosang asks after the 10th time Wooyoung has changed his position in the past 5 minutes. “Don’t worry, I’ll make sure San doesn’t take your place.”

“No, I’m fine. I’m just… a bit tired, actually.” Yeosang tears his eyes from the screen and regards the boy silently.

“Tired, huh? You can go lay down in our room, you know. You don’t have to force yourself to watch this with me.”

“No, it’s not that.” Wooyoung answers quickly. “I…” another glance at San’s oblivious profile, the boy totally emerged in the sappy story unfolding on the screen. “I wanted to watch this with you- with you, guys.” Yeosang sighs and turns to face his friend completely.

“Wooyoung.” He waits for the boy to finally meet his eyes, guilt written all over his face. “Take San and go to our room. I can see you can barely sit in your seat.”

“That’s because…”

“I  _ don’t  _ need the details, thank you very much.” He watches the other boy’s mouth open and close a couple of times without making any sound. “God, you’re dumb.” He shakes his head and turns his attention back to the screen. “Text me once you’re done. But I’m sleeping in my room. And so are you. We’ll… We can talk later, yeah?”

Wooyoung looks at him for a couple more seconds, then nods eagerly.

“Yeah, yeah. Of course. Thanks, Sangie. You’re the best.” He says and hugs the boy tightly, at which he could swear he sees San straighten his back ever so slightly. Then he stands up and fakes a yawn, stretching his arms theatrically, as much as the fullness of his body allows him.

“Hey, guys? I think I’m gonna head up for tonight. Anybody coming?” San looks up at him, confused.

“So soon? And in the middle of the movie? I thought you said you wanted to watch-”

“Yeah, well, I’m  _ tired _ , so.”

“Oh, okay. We can finish another time.” San says and stands up as well without giving it another thought, already ready to leave. “We’ll be going then. You coming, Yeosangie? We could play it on the TV in your bedroom?”

“Nah, I’m fine. I’ll hang out here for a while.” Yeosang says without looking up. “Just don’t mess up my bed.” San looks at him, confusion written all over his face.

“Why would I-?”

“Let’s just  _ go _ , San.” Wooyoung doesn’t let him finish, already pulling him by the arm in the direction of their rooms and San follows without further protest.

Once they’re inside, San takes his shoes off and plops himself on Wooyoung’s bed. “Wanna watch something to sleep?” He’s already messing with the remote, trying to turn the TV on. Wooyoung has to physically stop himself from rolling his eyes.

“San.” He says emphatically, takes the remote from the boy’s hands and waits for him to finally meet his eyes.

“What?” The other asks, still confused. It’s kinda adorable, actually, Wooyoung decides. But that’s not the energy he needs from him right now. He didn’t avoid the restroom like fire for the whole day just to go to sleep. And so he takes a deep breath, takes San’s both hands in his own and shamelessly straddles his thighs in one swift motion.

“Wooyoung, what-” San shuts up when Wooyoung guides his hands to his abdomen. He is startled only for a second, wrapping his fingers around Wooyoung’s belly eagerly, as if instinctively. Wooyoung stops a gasp right as it’s about to leave his lips and looks down through half-lidded eyes. “You said you were tired.” San states, despite his hands feeling up Wooyoung’s unmistakably swollen belly, as if trying to rearrange the opposing truths inside his mind. “That was a cover.” He says more to himself than anybody else. God, he’s adorable, Wooyoung thinks. “And Yeosang… won’t disturb us.” He reads the answer from Wooyoung’s face, as if unable to believe he hasn’t put two and two together sooner. “God, I’m dumb.” Wooyoung snickers and places his hands on San’s shoulders, scooping a bit closer. “Is this… all for me?” Wooyoung feels his dick twitch under San's hungry, possessive gaze and all he can manage is a sharp nod. “God, Woo. You’re…” He doesn’t finish, in favor of exploring further under Wooyoung’s blouse, while Wooyoung tries to relax under the inspection, sliding his hands to San’s chest and letting his head hang loosely. San takes the opportunity and nuzzles at the boy’s neck, while his hands explore and squeeze all the flesh they can find on the boy’s chest and around his hips. Wooyoung focuses on the touch and tries to keep his voice in, but when San’s hands go back to his belly and squeeze slightly without a warning it’s his hips that give him away, jerking forward without his consent. He curses them in his mind, and freezes, waiting for San’s reaction. He hears the boy hum in his ear and a shiver runs through his whole body. “Is there something else you got for me by any chance?” San whispers and his hands start to slowly wander lower.

“San…” Wooyoung can’t help but moan and the hands stop on their way immediately.

“Is this okay?” There’s a hint of uncertainty in the boy’s voice, and Wooyoung can’t trust his own at the moment, so he just nods frantically. San smiles and places his hand over Wooyoung’s crotch without a fuss. The touch is gentle, barely noticeable through the fabric, but the boy’s thighs still squeeze involuntarily with excitement. He feels San’s gaze drilling holes in his face, observing his responses as he gives Wooyoung’s shaft a soft rub.

“Wanna get rid of those?” San asks, playing with the hem of Wooyoung’s sweats. The boy looks San in the eyes, uncertainty written all over his face. He feels San draw mindless patterns in his thigh as he waits patiently for the green light and eventually it gives the intended effect of calming Wooyoung’s nerves down enough to give a shy nod. San smiles at him reassuringly. “Can you stand up for a second?” He asks softly, guiding Wooyoung by his hips. The boy slides back and stands in front of San awkwardly, fumbling with his sleeves and waiting for San’s next move, which soon turns out to be a soft nudge on his boxers. He locks eyes with the other boy for long enough to catch the reassuring smile sent his way, then focuses on the wall in front of him as he feels San slowly slide his sweats and boxers down his thighs, strategically ignoring the half-swollen member that jumps up and against Wooyoung’s loose shirt, in favor of carefully helping the boy out of the clothes, one leg at a time. Wooyoung has to physically fight the urge to cover himself. He hears the bed creak and he dares a glance at the boy in front of him, only to regret it soon after when he sees San has straightened up and is now leaning back on his hands and eating Wooyoung up with his eyes, as if trying to engrave the image in his mind forever. Wooyoung chews on his lip nervously and squeezes his hands into fists in a heroic effort to keep them at his sides despite the shameless betrayal of his penis, standing now proudly in its full glory. His body tenses unimaginably tighter when San reaches a hand towards him, and grabs the hem of Wooyoung’s shirt to lift it up slightly, handing it to the other boy. “Here. Could you keep it like that for me?”

“San…” seems to be the range of Wooyoung’s vocabulary at the moment.

“Shh, stay like that. You’re so… God, you’re something else.” San extends his arm again and Wooyoung inhales sharply, but the hand lands on his belly, drawing lazy circles all around it, enjoying the apparent bulge there. “So full for me. Just beautiful.” He then proceeds to hold Wooyoung’s back with the other hand while he presses down  _ right  _ at the boy’s bladder. Wooyoung yelps at the sudden pressure and lets go of the shirt. San smiles at the reaction and lets go of the boy’s stomach. “Come here.” And Wooyoung all but hauls himself back over San’s lap, wrapping his arms around the boy’s neck and pressing close, as close as possible to the intoxicating heat of San’s body. He feels his dick graze on San’s abs and sucks in a sharp breath. “Want to get me wet, Woo?” San murmurs and his hands land on his bare bottom. “Like you promised?” Wooyoung feels like he could burst out sobbing right then and there from the despariation.

“Yes, pleasee” he all but whines into San’s ear. San chuckles at that and squeezes Wooyoung’s buttcheeks, driving the boy even closer. He then stops to consider the hardness pressing into his abdomen. He slowly slides his hand back and wriggles it between their pressed bodies.

“Won’t the little guy be a problem, though?” He asks and grazes his finger up Wooyoung’s shaft. He smiles to himself when he hears the boy let out a muffled gasp where he’s pressing his face into San’s shoulder. “He's standing up so proudly? What should we do about him, hm?”

Wooyoung shudders and lets out a broken sob. 

“San-nie, pleasee” It takes everything for San not to give in to the desperation in the boy’s voice, ready to give him anything and everything he’d ask for.

“Shh… it’s okay. I’ve got you, remember? I’ll take care of you, okay?” San tries to gently push Wooyoung away to look him in the eyes but the boy refuses to budge, clinging to San’s neck like a koala, so instead he pats Wooyoung’s head soothingly, holding him close while his other hand slowly moves up from the boy’s dick. “Are you good so far, with… everything?” Wooyoung shudders when the hand rests on his belly, but gives a sharp nod into San’s shoulder. “Okay, that’s good, Woo. We’ll go slowly. Let me know if you want or need anything, yeah?” Wooyoung nods again and braces himself as the hand starts moving in slow, steady circles, not applying any pressure, but going by his soft gasps and wriggling, it must have given the desired effect. San keeps up the action for a while, massaging Wooyoung’s back and hips soothingly, until he feels the boy’s attempts of controlling his breathing work and feels him relax his body, allowing and accepting the gentle treatment. That’s when San presses down. Wooyoung shrieks and tenses back up, but San doesn’t release, resuming the circular massage with the new added pressure. Wooyoung wriggles his hips trying to run away in every possible direction until San stops him with a steady hand on his hip. The boy whimpers and gives in, letting himself be held in place, his legs trembling on both sides of San’s as he reluctantly focuses on the sensation in his strained bladder. The pain, fullness and pleasure blend together, creating an overwhelming presence and overshadowing everything else in the boy’s mind. San keeps massaging, paying close attention to every little detail of Wooyoung’s reaction and after a while he notices that his wriggling starts to follow the rhythm of his own hand. San smiles and encourages the movement with the hand on the boy’s hip and soon enough Wooyoung is slowly humping his thighs.

San tries to engrave the moment in the depths of his soul. He feels Wooyoung’s buttcheeks tense and relax on his thighs and his own breath starts coming short and his erection is becoming painfully impossible to ignore. He moves his hand from Wooyoung’s hip to adjust himself and in the process grazes over Wooyoung's neglected cock. It is rock hard and the boy desperately tries to get some friction from San’s body. San doesn’t have to think twice before he wraps his hand around Wooyoung and meets the boy’s thrust as he rides right into San’s fist. 

Wooyoung  _ moans  _ at the contact and his movements flutter as he squeezes his eyes painfully hard and the first tear rolls down his cheek, disappearing into San’s shirt. “That’s it, Woo. I’ve got you.” Wooyoung pumps into San’s hand again, but his eyes shoot back open when San presses down on his bladder in sync with his thrust, seemingly with all his strength. Wooyoung frantically tries to squeeze his thighs shut and wriggle away as the sudden pain rips through his body, but San guides him back forward instead, with another squeeze following soon after. “Keep moving, Woo. You’re doing great.”

“No no no no no, San, huurts, I can’t, need to-” 

“It’s okay, just breathe. You can stop any time you want. But it’s what you wanted, remember? This feels good, right? Just… pleasure yourself for me, hmm?”

Wooyoung lets out another sob but doesn’t protest any further. He lets out a long breath and intentionally moves his hips forward, accepting San’s hand resumming it’s twisted massage. At first slowly, he creates a rhythm of sliding into San’s fist while the latter presses down on his bladder. The rhythm is sickening and intoxicating at the same time, the fact that he knows when to expect the squeezes, which seem to get more and more intense while the releases less noticeable, yet he can’t seem to stop his movements, like in trance, pushing himself forward again and again into the piercing pain and pleasure. Wooyung feels his orgasm approaching quickly, quicker than he would like to admit, and he digs his nails into San’s back and holds his breath in an attempt to calm himself down, but San picks up on his desperation and smirks to himself.

“Try to push out.” he whispers into Wooyoung’s ear.

“C-can’t… I… If I do, I won’t be able-'' San presses down on his bladder  _ hard  _ and grips the base of his cock. A pathetic cry escapes Wooyoung’s lips and he tenses up, but there is nowhere to go, and so he shuts his eyes and tries to will his muscles to push the pee out, until a small stream starts leaking out  in time with his tears starting to fall freely, as a result soaking both San’s T-shirt and his sweats. Another broken sob rips through his body as the stream grows stronger and San starts jerking him off eagerly, smearing the warm liquid over Wooyoung’s length while his other hand moves back to patting Wooyoung’s back.

“That’s it, Woo. That’s it. Just let go.” The release rips through Wooyoung’s body like a thunder. He presses his mouth into San’s shoulder to muffle the sounds with little success, shaking his thighs and squeezing San into a tight embrace while the slimy mixture spurts out of his dick.

San feels the warmth surrounding him and closes his eyes in bliss as the liquid soaks through his clothes and hugs his own erection. He feels the body on top of him slowly go lax and become reduced to a shaking, panting mess on his lap. San swallows and shakes his head to clean his mind from the foggy feeling. He keeps a strong arm around the boy and pats his back soothingly and rocks him gently while waiting for life to reenter his body.

Finally he feels Wooyoung shift. The boy lifts himself on shaky hands to face his friend, but his eyes land on the still obvious bulge in San’s pants instead.

“Sannie? Do you, um, want…”

“No, Woo.” San quickly cuts him off and gently guides his chin up. “Don’t worry about me.” He runs his hands up and down Wooyoung’s arm and tries to smile reassuringly, but there is only worry on Wooyoung’s face.

“But…”

“No buts. Come on. You’re... tired and I’m… uh…” He trails off when Wooyoung visibly slumps and looks back down. “Look, I’d love you to, um, do. Me. But not like this.” Now it’s San’s turn to look lost for words. He scratches the back of his head and tries again. “Just not yet, okay? Let’s not rush it. I mean, oh god, it’s not like I want only you to-, I mean I want you to but- Actually, you know what, if you want to then, um… I’m sorry, jesus, I didn’t think this through…” A firm hand preses to his lips and prevents any more mess from spilling out.

“It’s okay, I get it.” Wooyoung swallows and looks down, trying to collect his thoughts. “I didn’t mean to press you, I know you don’t mean anything bad.” He plays with the hem of his shirt, covering his softening dick. “I can, suck you off another time, right? No rush.” He looks up and smiles faintly through his wet lashes. He watches San’s cheeks turn pink and he’s hauled into a tight embrace. He giggles and quickly hugs the boy back, ignoring the cold breeze on his bare bottom.

“Thank you, Woo. Hey, come on, let’s get you into the shower. You must be getting cold.” He tries to guide the boy into a standing position but he refuses to let go of San’s neck, clinging tighter instead.

“Mmm, don’t wanna.”

“Well, you’re gonna have to if you don’t want Yeosang kicking you out.” The boy stiffens a bit at the mention of his friend’s name, but still makes no attempts to move. “Okay, come on.” San sighs and stands up carefully, with Wooyoung still in his grip. The boy lets out a surprised yelp but quickly wraps himself around San’s body. “Let’s get you cleaned up, yeah?” San makes his way into the bathroom, puts a towel on the toilet and carefully sits the boy down. He quickly excuses himself, going back to the bedroom and comes back in a clean pair of sweatpants. Wooyoung’s sweatpants. Wooyoung is about to ask if none of the T-shirts fit, but San shuts him up with the warmest smile to match his bare chest, and Wooyoung decides to admire rather than complain. 

“How are you? Are you okay? Did you… like it?” San asks and wets a cloth in warm water before kneeling in front of his friend. Wooyoung smiles shyly and nods his head. It takes him a moment to respond, as he holds his breath when San quickly washes his privates and moves down to his thighs. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I did, but you didn’t…”

“I told you not to worry about it.” San interrupts, washing his calves and moving to his feet. “Besides…” He clears his throat and focuses on washing between Wooyoung’s toes, “It felt amazing.” He glances up and sees the boy watching him intently with the most adorable expression ever. It takes all San’s strength not to melt at the cuteness.

“It did?”

“Yeah, it… Yeah.” He puts the cloth away and helps Wooyoung into fresh underwear. “It really did. Come on, let’s get you under covers, yeah?”

Once Wooyoung is secure and tugged in under the blankets, San sits on the edge of the bed and they just look at each other, enjoying each other’s presence. Eventually Wooyoung shifts and sighs.

“I promised Yeosang I’ll talk to him.”

“Yeah, okay. Of course. I’ll go get him.”

“I won’t tell him… anything, though.”

“You tell him whatever you feel is appropriate. I trust you with this. I will deal with him if I have to.”

“Okay.” Silence. “Hey, um, today was…”

“Yeah.” San agrees with a tender smile. “It was. I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah? Get some beauty sleep.” He goes to stand up but Wooyoung grabs his hand and stops him.

“Hey, um, can you, hold me for a while?” San smiles at Wooyoung’s uncertain frown and wraps himself around the boy’s body tightly.

“Sure, Woo. I’ll hold you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have nothing in my defence, literally don't listen to anything i say ever


End file.
